Becoming Irreplaceable

I recently went to San Francisco to sit down with a very well known 'fitness oriented' company (I can't say which for legal purposes).  I have actually solicited myself to them by email 4 years ago.  I at that time, read their magazine (it came out every 90 days) and was so impressed with their content. I sent this long email to a corporate person in New York that was listed in the magazine.  I wanted to get my face connected with this company. I wanted my passion to mesh with theirs.  What was the result?  They sent me boxes and boxes of magazines to distribute within local gyms that I worked at. (and to give them away for free in giveaways from my blog, classes, with client's etc, etc.) In return, I got boxes and boxes of free supplements.  No $$$.  Okay, that's fair.  This company being based out of New York was intimidating to me, yet I felt strong and quite passionate that I had something to offer them. Something more than what I saw in their magazine.  This wasn't what I had in mind -- AT ALL.  SERIOUSLY?   I strongly felt they needed something different in that magazine. I needed to tell them that and I would be MORE THAN WILLING to be that person.    You see, the fitness industry almost looks the same when it comes to the 'commercial' look of it. The reality is missing.  The truth is missing.  Fitness looks different on EVERYONE is how I see it.   I see it every time I teach a class.  I see it every time I walk into the gym. Fitness has levels and it has seasons. With this particular look being shoved down every-bodies throat, it's NO WONDER WHY PEOPLE STRUGGLE WITH THEIR WEIGHT!  It's ridiculous to me.  Right?

As a woman in her mid 40's, I am in better shape then when I was just starting out in the fitness industry at a size 3, back at age 19 (when I was dabbling).   But, the fitness industry doesn't allow anyone to stay in their own lane.  It's cookie cutter.  The bobble headed industry is always looking around to see what everybody else is doing - so they all pretty much do the same thing.

So, back to San Francisco.  I was sitting down in a meeting with this company that happen to be in the City for a project that week.  They agreed to sit down with me and hear what I had to say.  I was relentless trying to get this 20 minute meeting.   They of course, could not deny my experience.  That impressed them.  The amount of certifications I hold, that impressed them.  My weight loss story, how I lost 95 pounds in five and a half months and came out of it looking the way I did.  That impressed them.   MY AGE, THAT DID NOT IMPRESS THEM.  Sure, they could photoshop me, they photoshop everyone.  BUT, I didn't want them to do that. Well maybe my forehead or something since I don't do botox or fillers (that's scary).   I was trying to help them to see that, again, FITNESS LOOKS DIFFERENT ON EVERYONE. Fitness possess an individual.   I felt that they needed a campaign that catered to normal folks that are intimidated by these fitness models; and might I add, they can't sustain that body type for too long. Sooner or later all that cut you see in pictures (aside from the self-tanner, photoshop and complete depletion of carbs and water ) fill up. If you didn't photoshop the CUT parts of their rock hard looking abs, arms and legs, you'd see that the definition is much, much less (especially if they are boozy on the reg, which most are because these stupid companies don't pay that much for these youngsters just starting out, poor depressed hungry things - I'm kidding on the depressed part).  They need WATER  and carbs (aside from the photo shopping)-- ha ha ha ha!

So this company loved what I had to say, and as I was finishing, this beautiful 20 something model walked in and well that's her job, MODELING ready for the shoot they were about to let me sit in on and watch. Show me how the behind the scenes of a shoot looks like.  That part made me a little sad. Photography has entered my heart since my Dad passed away. The creativity has began to take over me.  When I walk around and shoot I feel calm as I do when I write. I begin to feel hungry for knowledge on how to be better.   I feel so creative, free and relaxed and then HAPPY.  So I felt that would have been cool to see how they orchistrate this.  But I was so turned off by some of the dismissive facial expressions at some of the things I was saying.    So,   I declined and Union Square was bouncing through my mind -- SHOPPING, SCREW THESE GUYS, LET'S GO SHOPPING!

I got a call two days later thanking me for my time but, NO.  N-O!

In that experience what I realized is that, the aesthetics will always be and are always replaceable. But not every fitness model can relay the message to the public that STICKS. Not every fitness spokesperson can motivate people and touch them.   What's not replaceable is personality, experience and the heart felt drive that compliment a great look, yes I'm aging, I can't help that (although my mind feels none of this by the way...HA HA HA HA).  A look that the public who are fitness oriented, but aren't walking around photo shopped all day long! Okay?  Not every fitness model is an actual ATHLETE and can move.  I can do those things. I can jump really high.  I can do burpees, push-ups, agilities, quick feet, whatever.  I can.  I teach it every day! (but not Friday's a girl's got to rest) But they wanted to stick with what they know.  I get that. It's why they are a huge company.

So my age trumped my abilities. the athlete that I am, my twenty five plus years experience, my shape (that I have worked so hard on to maintain since my ninety five pound weight loss) the muscle growth I have fought for.  No basically I'm too old in their eyes. I'm a Golden Girl? Huh?  I thought I would never hear that.  I mean sure, I've heard you are not tall enough, but really?

So, did I feel defeated? The age thing at first stung a tad.   It brought me back to how society works and what society commands (due to spoon feeding us throughout the years).  The more the fitness industry keeps its head like a bobble head, looking all around to see what everybody else is doing, then we will continuously see the same thing over and over again. When there is a realness out there, IT'S US!   The fitness industry will continuously recreate the same person over and over again.

NEXT!  Moving right along and keeping it moving is what I have done since.  There is a company that will get it. But in the meantime, what a shame that is.  In the REAL WORLD (that preconceived notion). It's the fitness trainers, the mentors, and fitness instructors on the daily THAT ARE MAKING THE DIFFERENCE IN SO MANY LIVES ALL AT ONCE.  I'm so proud to be a part of that.  I can't begin to explain the feeling inside of me for it.  PASSION is the best word.  I crave more and more education to learn, as in February I will be inidated with so much new education.  I CANNOT WAIT to bring it back and share it with my students.  But  I WILL take it any day, then listening to robot talk, as it regurgitates itself over and over again.

Let your certified trainers and certified instructors know how much you appreciate them whenever possible.  Always thank them for a great session or a great class the preparation for such is all for you.  I say certified for a reason. There are a lot of 'fitness jockeys' out there that have zero education and are coaching people on how to lose weight and get fit.  It's scary.  But,  the amount of money we spend on our education, written testing, practical testing,  our time memorizing our workout routines to present to you, the preparation time is constant, music selection, etc., etc.  This  is ALL due to the passion we possess to HOPEFULLY change your life.  Much love to every single person out there struggling to change their health.

* For some inquiries.  I am no longer BIGGEST LOSER certified.  Because there were not enough participants annually, they decided to do away with the program (training Biggest Loser participants that get cut from the show, or have signed up to do the home challenges).  I'm bummed, but that is why you have not been able to sign up this new season.  My apologies.  And hope all that in-boxed me get this.

Before I Turn In. A Thought...

On my way out of work tonight at the gym, I was chatting it up with one of the sweetest front desk staff members.  We happen to be talking about all the events that were happening outside the doors. You see, we are located in the heart of downtown.  So a lot of times, once you step outside the gym doors, you are suddenly thrust into anything from, people, hearing music, smelling amazing aromas of the food, from all the restaurants surrounding us to, cigarette smoke to the smell of urine and sewer.  Yes, quite a range, I agree.

But, we were looking across the street at the old Crest Theater. There was an event that was getting ready to start and she said, "What I would give for a tub of buttery popcorn right now."  I smiled and replied, "The struggle is real isn't it? It's all around us.   Don't let it happen...." She smiled and she said something that hit me.  I was so GRATEFUL to learn, someone else had finally got it too.  She understands it's not a one-sided thing.  It does not discriminate.  She ended the conversation before she had to attend to a member, "You know, I'm grateful to have this job at this gym.  It has taught me, and I have learned from talking to the different members, WE ALL STRUGGLE.  IT'S NOT JUST ME,  IT'S ALL OF US.  EVEN YOU. YOU ARE IN SHAPE, YOU HAVE TO WORK TO KEEP THAT SHAPE.  WE ALL STRUGGLE.  

She couldn't be more right.  I walked away with a smile on my face.  She has finally released so much pressure off her shoulders and she's lighter for it.   You are not alone.  Temptation is everywhere, just don't be so hard on yourself. We all slip.  Then we wake up and we are blessed with hitting the re-set button!

Heck I'm struggling as I write this.  I want a snack, but it's almost 9 p.m. LOL...Have a great night!

If you look at the bottom of this photo,  you see our gym roof has basketball courts, fire pits & flat screen.

#myphotograhy

My Best,
That Gym Girl

FUNNY ENCOUNTERS IN GROUP FITNESS CLASSES

Throughout the 28 years that I've been teaching group fitness classes, there have been a LOT of shall we say, blooper moments, encounters from members (that they have shared with me) and things that have happened in classes that are just hysterical.  Group fitness can be a total blast!  Many have seen things that have made them scratch their heads LOL...Many of us instructors have our own personal thoughts running through our heads when things are going array (Like my own thoughts). 

I thought it would be fun to let you in on that.  Perhaps share some of those off the wall, funny, curious, almost embarrassing moments with YOU.  My only disclaimer to this article, is that, YES I could share all the serene, positive, zen moments, but today I want to share some funny times, so please know this is all IN FUN! :

1. Where are your boxer BRIEFS, HELLO -- stop moving so fast...Oh Lord, I need to look away!!!  Doesn't that hurt?  Ladies, yes, I see you looking him, then back at me TO SAY SOMETHING...!!!  Um.....
2. Oh my gddddd, these CRAMPS.  I can't.  I have to, dammmmnnnn!! I just want to lay down. Maybe I'll start with the ending stretching part first, and forget to get back up....I wonder if they'll notice.....
3. Please, oh no, NO...NO DON'T CRAP IN MY CLASS, hurry GO. You can make it....Nobody cares about your water bottle!!!!!!    HURRY GO, IT'S FAR!  
4. Please God, please don't let this tampon fall out. (I'm sorry, I know, TMI ) And there it goes.....Damn burpees!
5. Am I the only coordinated fool in this room???!!!!!!!! C'monn!
Crap, now I have salvage my choreography and freestyle. Damn you people...!!!!
6.  Why do you have chopsticks on your person while taking my GROUP EXERCISE CLASS?  
7. Geez, what was I thinking staying out so late last night, I'm on 4 hours of sleep. I smell like Bar. Just barrrr.  Ew.  I wish I was a yoga instructor right nowww, FML!! (ooops sorry my fellow beautiful instructors that happen to teach yoga, no dig, no, no none at all.)
8. That ladies maxi pad seriously just flew out from her pant leg.  How do I help her to play it off so she can get it?  OMG! 
9. I must remember to put on my grocery list, GOLD BOND powder for men. I feel terrible.  I didn't know their balls rub together while I make them do those scissor abs; causing friction. I'm SO SORRY!  I have a proverbial  pair, that's all!  SOMEBODY tell me these things!

10.  Oh he is so hot.  DAMMNNNN.  Geez that's ANOTHER FML!  Are there levels to FML????!!!  The end. (I don't mix business with pleasure)
11. Someone just farted during crunches, IN THE FRONT ROW - IN FRONT OF THE HUGE  FAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

12. Wow, incontinence IS REAL, another FMLLLLLLLL.  It's only because, well never mind. 

13.  How do I tell that guy he has a huge hole in his shorts and the front desk can practically see his man parts?  Whyyy?  Grrrr.
14.  Creepy.  Telling me "I can smell  your soul!" Who says things like that to their instructor? 
15.  That ladies knee is on the side of her leg AND SHE WANTS ME TO DO WHAT?  KNOCK IT INTO PLACE?  Drop the mic....

16.  And I'm mopping up puke for the millionth time.  I see she had Greek yogurt for breakfast...FMLLLL!
17. What in the hell kind of exercise is THAT?  I never seen anything like it in my life!!  I can't even steal the moves! 
18. CRAP, I just messed up . DID ANYONE NOTICE? Dammmit, yup...DAMN FRONT ROW!  :)
19.  No, no, OPEN YOUR EYES. Please do not lose your balance and fall off the bike.  Wait is he praying? No he's falling asleep!
20. I'm picking up teeth.  GREAT -- NOBODY LISTENS TO THE TEACHER --- OH NO!  I had a good play list too!!
21.  This lady keeps coming into my class with these damn 70's headphones on (they must be 5 lbs!) while STILL standing in the front row under the speaker -- MOVE TO THE BACK ROW.  Now, THERE's an idea...Just sayin'
22.  Great view -- NO explanation. I do a lot of looking a way...Grrrr...SMILE!
23. Am I in the Twilight Zone, or is this person actually walking up to the front of the room (while I'm conducting a PACKED step class, back in the day) and HIKING HER LEG UP ON THE MIRROR TO STRETCH? HELLO DO YOU SEE ALL OF THESE PEOPLE?  DO YOU HEAR THE MUSIC?  THERE IS A FITNESS CLASS CURRENTLY TAKING PLACE ...Smh

24.  This lady literally just drove 6 miles and timed it just right that my class had just ended. Really?  Blending in with 12 people to get a damn STAMP for completing the class THAT JUST ENDED - THAT YOU DIDN'T TAKE, and you don't think I see YOU?
25. God, I stink all the time.  I'm gym clothes A LOT. I have no game in gym clothes. I stink! No, no please don't come up and ask me something -- I STINK!  However, it's a great weapon in the grocery store when people get in your space WHILE YOU ARE TRYING TO PAY AND THEY ARE ALL UP ON YOU!
26. I can't see crap right now and I just thought one person was a different person and I told my friend to wave at him with me....Ooops wrong guy at the gym.  I'm blind as hell....Laser surgery on bucket list
27. Smiling isn't as easy as I thought it would be while one is exerting themselves - while exercising.  
28.  Who am I to ask people to whoop/holler back at me when I just commanded them to get out breath.  I need to make my damn mind up. I wonder what they are thinking right now...They look so seriouuussss -- like they want hurt me!
29. I have to pee and I have 30 damn more minutes.  Dammmn, I'm so behind on my Keegals.  

30. Why is this guy bringing into my class, a full box of Cereal and eating it while exercising?  This is a new one!  Odd!  He didn't even share!
31. I'm not sure if I should tell that lady her areola has now successfully made an appearance in class and that a sports bra is of great help for these things.
32.  I literally just mooned the class! Half asleep, teacher didn't show up to her 5:30 A.M. class. I get the call to rush over and help. Guess I forgot my workout pants under my sweats....I should be tanned at all times, wow!  I'M SORRY FOR THAT.  You just SAW MY ARSE!!! OMG!!!!  ..OOOPS - I'M NOT AWAKE!
33. Thank you for literally getting in my personal space and screaming, "I DON'T LIKE YOU." There's the door.....
34. I wonder if anyone will notice I'm wearing two different tennis shoes on each foot...Note to self: Don't pack gym bag in the dark. 
35.  Why, why -- WHY is that guy ALWAYS kicking crazy!  It's kickboxing  not the ROCKETTES?  The members nick-named him, "HIGH KICK" .

Some of you could POSSIBLY ADD ON TO THIS.  You yourself have had GYM THOUGHTS as you people watch, or something happens to YOU while working out.  Comment below and PLEASE, DO share...Let's keep the smiling going...

How Often Do You Snort Social Media

Sometimes it can be incredibly frustrating to sit back and watch people lie to themselves.  They also lie to us when they PUT IT OUT THERE--OUT LOUD, to the UNIVERSE.   Wishy-washy isn't 100% dedication. Leaving one component out of health and wellness isn't 100% dedication.  It's in fact, 50%.  That can lead to zero if it keeps going.

I watch people more concerned about social media than actually taking care of themselves. Their DAILY dose is SOCIAL MEDIA. Their first spoonful usually takes place right when they open their eyes in the morning.  Could you imagine if you used at least 50% of the time that you inject your life with social media posting selfies and the distractions you place in front of you (a.k.a fun at every single opportunity for social media opportunities) to dedicate to your FITNESS? This isn't to suggest fun is out of the question. But have you ever tried just having phone and not taking ANY pictures, or not posting the pictures that you did take? Some just can't even hold back.  Sadly, many don't seem to realize the accountability they put out loud, out to the Universe just isn't their truth.  It's a wish. It's talk. It's not action.  It's a lie.

As if there are not enough excuses made to not to work out, now social media is yet another non-verbalized excuse/distraction. Studies show, that a high percentage of adults will fall off the band wagon during their health and wellness journey.  Maybe you have before.  This can be the very cause to send you down back down "let down" street.  The street you yourself could be creating and do not even realize it yet.  Many are on that street already and don't know how to get off if it.  But, on the flip side, I myself and many people do use social media to document and hold ourselves accountable. We create a 70/30 rule.  70% of the time OFF social media. You can do the math and know what the 30% is.  We can take pictures while working out, sure.  There is a balance to it (it's called wait until you get home to post, use the post to hold yourself accountable.).  I personally, do not take a lot of pictures while working out, BECAUSE I'M WORKING OUT and I utilize that time to focus.  The world does NOT need to know what I am doing constantly at every bicep curl and push up, every stop in my car and every time I walk through those gym doors, or need to know what I'm doing every moment of the day.   That time to myself is so precious.  Shutting out the world to do me!  Some of you know exactly what I'm talking about.  

I actually had 2 brand new clients document the time they spent on social media vs. how much time they spent working on their health and wellness goals.  One was so completely addicted to social media, he couldn't get through a workout, he had to keep checking to see how many, "LIKES" he got on a picture he posted.  At times, he would disappear to the bathroom to try and get ONE GOOD SELFIE. (Now you and I both know, sometimes you have to take A LOT OF PICTURES to get a good one.  Ha ha ha.  I can be time consuming. )  I have to shake my head at this.   I find that to be a problem.  Social media can become and addiction.  For some, it is, and they have no clue that they are now an addict.  I've heard some say they are getting off of social media for a while, only to find, that never even happened, they couldn't follow through with their words they put out there.  Ugh.  They are addicts. If you are a food addict/emotional eater, you have a VERY, VERY high percentage of rate of transferring one addiction to the next.    The ego changes, the attitude changes and instead of building their future life of health and wellness they are too worried about how many followers they have and how many likes they get.  It's KIM KARDASHIAN in the making (well you know what I mean ha ha ha).  There's only one KIM!  The addict NEEDS, no I'm sorry, MUST  be seen, when really they can be seen in REAL LIFE doing what they tell the world they are going to do. Some have gone as far as BUYING followers and likes.  It's obvious when this happens, because many of those purchases of those FOLLOWERS are fake accounts utilized only for that purpose.  WOW!!  But all of this is for what? It's to boost your popularity.   It boggles my mind. 

I put the clients to the test for 21 days.  It takes 21 days to create a habit.  I asked them, to stay off of social media for 21 days, PERIOD. I became their accountability partner. They post -- I KNOW.   Instead, I had them journal their progress, their feelings (yes while on a health and wellness journey there are new things you discover about yourself through the process. Some good and some not so good. If you are too busy with your face in the phone you will miss some INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT OPPORTUNITIES to learn about your past self and present self.) as they were on a new journey in their lives.  I told them to go and find those friends that have a good balance.  Those that have some of the same goals, and build back up those relationships, as they themselves damaged relationships by their addiction. Take classes and find different ways of working out.  This also gave them more of an opportunity to cook, food prep and try new dishes.  This gave them more time to spend with their families, QUALITY TIME instead of face in phone and statusing every damn move they made.

The result was INCREDIBLE.  Each, one not only lost a great percentage in their body fat, and lost weight, but they felt so much better in the sense, they came back down to the REAL TIME WORLD --- reality.  They made true commitments to some of the relationships they hadn't realized they damaged, they discovered foods they liked by cooking more.  They found new workouts they had no clue existed, or they challenged themselves to do and stay consistent with it.  One of my students got back on track with their spirituality. One of them decided to have a cooking night with her friends that were gymrats, this way while socializing with them, they could all try new things.  This being done without their phones, leaving the environment completely authentic and being truly PRESENT.  They were happier and lighter.  THIS SERIOUSLY MADE ME SO INCREDIBLY PROUD OF THEM BOTH.  I know it wasn't easy.  But THEY DID IT!!!!

Yes it's frustrating to sit back and watch.   But you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make the horse drink it.  Some will stay in denial while they must be seen.  Some will keep talking the talk. As a trainer there's nothing I can do about it, but move on to the one's that truly want help and change and put in the actual time, REAL TIME.  Actions speak volumes.   It's clear who the addicts are. You probably know one or two.  But like any addict, they themselves have to recognize it, admit it, get real and follow through with ACTION (not talk) to correct it.  IT CAN BE CORRECTED.  I promise you that. I've seen it, I've coached folks to learn balance.  

Ask yourself, how many times a week do you drive home without hitting the gym (and I'm not talking about driving to the gym to hit a cardio machine, unless you have a cardio day that's worked into a balanced week's workout)?  How many times have you actually gone to the gym and left your phone in the car?  (It's a good habit to get into, as long as it's hidden of course.)  Test yourself, be honest and document how many hours per day you have spent uploading pictures onto social media, updating status', scrolling down to see what everybody is doing in there life, etc.  Some would be very surprised at the score, VERY SURPRISED.  You know how fast an hour can go by when you are scrolling or working on selfies? There should be a balance if you have goals to better yourself. 

THE CELL PHONE HAS BECOME A NEMESIS FOR SO MANY PEOPLE IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE.   It's unbelievable to me.    I don't buy excuses anymore.  I've been in this industry way too long to even hear a new one and actually buy it.  

My latest motto is STARVE YOUR DISTRACTIONS and FEED YOUR FOCUS.  You are the only one that can do this.  Don't let a damn phone and social media stand in the way of the body you want.  I can say I can look at a few people and in my mind I think, my god, had they stopped being so focused on social media, they could have a rockin' tight, fit and firm body.  Their fitness progress doesn't even have to be the way that it is at this present time, if they would just STOP putting distractions in the way of their goals.  I as a professional person in the fitness industry cannot just TALK.  I set an example.  I live, eat and breathe my goals.  I adjust my play time accordingly.  My wellness comes first.   For some, fitness is their therapy.  For me, it is as well.  It's incredible to push your body to the limits you THINK you have.

I ENCOURAGE YOU TO A 21 DAY CHALLENGE -- PUT THE PHONE DOWN.  STAY OFF OF SOCIAL MEDIA  (even dating sites)-- ALL OF IT. Come back to reality, re-group with your ego, rebuild your relationships you may unknowingly damaged, spend quality time with your family/friends, turn up the stereo in your home and experiment in the kitchen. TURN UP THE VOLUME IN YOUR LIFE WITHOUT HAVING TO POST IT (journal throughout this time.  Every time you feel the need to log on, grab your journal and write....YOU CAN DO THIS AND I'M RIGHT HERE TO BE YOUR ACCOUNTABILITY COACH.  

Always In Fitness,
THAT Gym Girl

It Was Time To Make A Change. Bye Bye McDonald's!

Making changes in our life can be scary.  They can be especially scary when you don't feel good.   Many do not realize that the food we put into our bodies, the processed foods/fast foods affect our brain function and the way our body itself functions.  The word weight loss turns many people off.  It turns them off because it means CHANGE.  Change can be scary can't it?  But, when is enough, ENOUGH?

I want you to meet Lori. Lori has changed her life and watching the changes are simply amazing!  Lori's going to share with you, the journey that she is now on.

*     *    *

Almost 5 years ago I changed careers. I went from a very active job to a desk job. Over the years I started putting on weight. I realized I was not my happy go lucky self anymore. I would get mad easily. I started to become real moody, sometimes asking myself why I let the little things bother me so much. It's very hard to explain, I wasn't sure why I was feeling this way. I had no idea that my weight gain over the years had brought me to this point. I had said for quite sometime that I needed to get healthy, but never had the motivation to do it. My daughter would always try to get me to eat better and workout, but I would never listen, I just wasn't ready.  I put up the excuses barrier.  I LOVED to eat out a lot. Double cheese burgers from McDonald's were my favorite.   Oh, it tasted so good.  After, I would go straight home and lay down.  I never did much of anything. Still at this point, I did not know my weight had any impact on the way I was feeling mentally, I did feel like crap physically and knew my weight played had to be playing a role in this. 

Physically I was a mess!  When trying to walk up the stairs, I would become out of breath. I didn't like that shortness of breath feeling at all!  Taking long walks just wan't for me.  I pretty much didn't want to do anything.   Trying to do the most basic exercise was uncomfortable to me and I didn't like it.  So I stayed in denial. I didn't think at the time my weight gain was playing a big role in the way I was feeling mentally.

Doing it alone?  I wasn't ready for that yet.   I text my best friend and told her let's join Fitness 19. Thankfully, she was all for it! March 26, 2015 I walked into the gym by myself and signed up.  I JOINED A GYM!   Keep in mind this is my first time ever joining a gym. My palms were sweaty I felt sick, but I knew I was ready. On that same day I met with a personal trainer. I knew going in that I wanted a personal trainer because I had never been a member of a gym before and I didn't know what I needed to do to accomplish my goals. I did not know how to use the gym equipment, I was afraid people would look at me crazy because I wasn't doing something right. But thankfully, a couple days later my best friend joined too!  She became my motivation. She had been down this path before and assured me everyday that I had this! I never worked out, only for short periods of time. When I say short periods I mean,  two week would be the maximum, in a little gym in my apartment complex.   Now that I think about it, actually joining a gym was a huge step for me! 

On that day my personal trainer took my measurements and got me on the scale. OH THE SCALE!!!  I weighed 180 lbs. My waist measured 39.5 inches my hips measured 44.5 inches. I set my goal with my personal trainer to lose 15 to 20 lbs and build lean muscle.   

Here we go!  I started off at the gym with four, one hour sessions. My first personal training session was on March 29,2015. I did this training by myself as my best friend worked out on her own. I broke it up into one day a week sessions with him. My personal trainer was great! He guided me and gave me routines to do the rest of the week. I started off learning cardio techniques that would activate my metabolism (the one that somehow got lost). 

On July 25, 2015 my best friend and I bought a one month group training session with him. We started progressing, at this point I am proud to say I had lost 20 pounds!! I reached my first goal!!! Now I just needed to focus on building lean muscle.   My personal trainer started us on light weights so we could build our strength and progress.  But, at the end of July we joined a new gym.  This time it felt different.  I had lost 20 pounds and we went in knowing we wanted to continue with a personal trainer because we were starting to see results! We signed up with a personal trainer and he put us through high intensity circuit training. Wow!  We train with our personal trainer five times a month and do circuit training two to three times a week. The other days we're on our own. Our new personal trainer started us off with weight lifting. I was scared as I had never lifted before, I thought I was going to hurt myself. It took me some time to start enjoying it, but as soon as I started seeing my body change I loved it!  I can truly say, I never thought I would be one to enjoy the gym as much as I do today. It has changed me! In fact when I went to Hawaii for work, when I got off the plane and checked into my hotel room, I put my workout clothes on, and went and found the hotel gym.  The old me would've plopped down on my bed and either played on Facebook or watched television and ate food that wasn’t helping my health.

I'm back to my happy self again, I do not let the little things bother me like they use too!  I love myself again!  Wow, I never realized I stopped loving myself.   It is sad for me to think about it.  To really confront how I was truly treating myself.   I feel like a whole new person, it's hard for me as I sit her and type my story out.  The tears are flowing down my face because I did not know I was damaging myself.  I was not living. I was existing.  I am not that woman any longer!     I love my results thus far, I feel more confident and I am so glad that I have more energy.    The couch is no longer winning!

   

I last weighed myself about two weeks ago.  I'm happy to report that I weighed 157.2 and my measurements reflected that my waist was down to 33 inches, my hips were down to 42.5 inches. This has been the best change I've made in my life!!!    I'm learning new things everyday.  I'm still going, I'm not done!  I'm a work in progress.  My eating habits aren't perfect, but they are my choices are healthier and much better than they were.  I realize now that it's true,  this is a lifestyle change.  I'm glad I pulled myself up off that couch and chose this new lifestyle!

My best friend has been with me on this journey, having her by my side has been a tremendous help, we motivate each other! We hold each other accountable.  Especially when one of us has those "I don't want to" days.   I'm not a lazy person when it comes to everyday life things.  You mention the word, GYM, negative thoughts reflected in my attitude about it.  I had every excuse not to include the word GYM in my vocabulary let alone my life.  

I know it's hard to motivate yourself and go for it.  But,  if I can do this, I know you can too!  It's got to be for you.   You have to want it bad enough to get it, you can't make excuses, just like everything else you have to fit it in your schedule. In the beginning it was a real struggle for me to get off work at 5 pm get home change and head to the gym.  Working out is a huge stress reliever and I would have never believed that, although I would hear that all the time, had I not experienced it myself. If you set your mind to do it you can do it! You can accomplish anything, I was 38 when I decided to make this lifestyle change.  I believe that it's NEVER TOO LATE! 

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The Unknown Can Be Scary

One of the things that I sit and  think about is that day, December 28, 1998.  My daughter was almost 12 months old and my son was 2 ½.  I unlocked the door to our old home.  Walking through the door made my heart drop. This was the home my song came home to from the hospital when he was born. As I was stepping inside this time without their dad, my heart broke.  It broke for all of us.

I had gained 70 lbs with my daughter during my pregnancy and again I was back at square one. I had lost 95 pounds after my son was born (that was so HARD!!!).   My knees couldn’t handle the weight, neither could my back.  I had everything you would think working against me.  STRESS of being a new single parent of a baby and toddler, not knowing how in the world we were going to make it.  That scared the crud out of me.  I had three jobs, so paying for daycare was going to be incredibly challenging.  I wasn’t feeling my best with the weight on my body.  Sleeping was challenging and my back always hurt.  My blood pressure could have been better.  Getting them both with me to my second job - THE GYM was also going to be a challenge ( a challenge that later reaped many benefits for my children in their lives).

I refused to let my inner voice sit on my left shoulder and talk me out of things that were important to me.  I just wanted to be healthy again.   I just wanted to feel comfortable in my skin.  I wanted to set the example as I lead in fitness/health and wellness.  I loved myself enough to shut the voice down and strive to reach three goals for my health.  1. Get my blood pressure to a better number; 2. Lose 35 lbs in less than 90 days; 3. Lose the rest 35 pounds in less than another 90 days.

Now don’t get me wrong, the mind games, they were trying.  The voice at times was RELENTLESS! Everyday I was exhausted at 5:00 p.m.  Driving to the end of town to pick my babies up from daycare, rushing to the gym to teach my class, get them settled in childcare - which both of my children LOVED going to the gym when they were little, then going home, bathing them, reading and playing with them before bedtime, getting dinner dishes done, put away, transcribing recorded statements for two insurance companies kept me up late at night, then to get myself cleaned up before getting up at 6:00 a.m.  annnnd take a deep breath, whew!   I was Mom and I was Dad in my household.    There was extreme pressure on me financially.  I had to keep us a float.

Stress can hinder weight loss.  I knew this.  But what I also knew is that when I lost the weight I had to keep in mind that my body was not going to look like it did at 21.  I loved myself no matter what my weight was or how my body would look - the important thing I had to keep in the front of my mind was, that being HEALTHY for my kids is what matters and is important.  The quality of their life is what drove me to reaching my goals.

You are going to be, or can be your own worst enemy.   Each day is an opportunity to keep moving forward  just one day at a time.  Shutting off that voice is something you have to practice.  Not allowing negative thoughts to control you and steer your day is challenging in itself.  BUT IT TAKES PRACTICE.  What I did, and if you can, practice only thinking positively of what you are going to achieve today and then do it.   If you can practice this, you will achieve your goals!   Love yourself no matter how your jeans fit.

Today, I am proud that I am healthier than I was at 21. I am in better shape prior to being pregnant with my first child.  My energy level just from exercise alone carries me.   The voice, is it still there?  Sometimes it tries to turn up the volume on it's own, and I keep pressing MUTE!

I'm no longer living paycheck to paycheck wondering how I am going to make it.  I'm proud that I can say that for myself because it was a struggle.  A REAL STRUGGLE!   I sacrificed a lot of ENTERTAINMENT time to keep plugging forward to reach my goals.  

Today, both of my children are working.  My son started at 17 and my daughter started at 16.  I think my work ethic may have rubbed off.  I thank my Dad, may he rest in peace for this.  He had a strong work ethic too.  I miss you Dad!

You have to STARVE YOUR DISTRACTIONS TO SUCCEED.  YOU CAN DO THIS!  Get out a good old piece of paper, not your phone or computer and WRITE DOWN YOUR GOALS.  PUT IT IN YOUR FACE EVERYDAY until you reach them.

DEDICATION PAYS OFF

ME - 210 POUNDS

This has always been my 'go to' before picture.   My motivation for weight loss and sticking to a healthy lifestyle.  

I have never viewed weight loss as a temporary thing because well, as many of us know, IT CAN COME BACK!  

So, what are you prepared to do?  When you are at the end of your goal and hit it, do you stop there?  Do you have a plan in place to keep going so it doesn't come back?   PLEASE DO!  YOU SHOULD!   

The weight CAN STAY OFF, it's just up to you to keep it off.     Plus, losing weight and gaining it back ruins the elasticity of your skin.  (Stretching it out).  Save yourself that heartache and make THIS your lifestyle.   That doesn't mean you can't once in a while enjoy your favorite foods.  NOT AT ALL!

Commit to a healthy lifestyle...Stay dedicated!  MAKE YOURSELF ACCOUNTABLE!

Me 120 Pounds

STAY TUNED --- WE HAVE A BRAND NEW FEATURE  COMING VERY VERY SOON A
100 POUND WEIGHT LOSS STORY 

What Makes You Think You Beat It?

Do you know what your triggers are?  You claim to be an emotional eater, but do you really know what makes you do it?  One minute your are fine sitting on the couch, you start thinking about something and BLAM, next thing you know you are shoveling ice cream into your mouth, and at a time that is just BAD! ALL BAD. Why do you do it?

WE HAVE TO MEET OUR PAIN, IN ORDER TO DEAL WITH IT.

If you are on a journey to take back your life and get healthy, then you really need to figure this out. Otherwise, you could be back to square one. Seriously, and it can happen fast.  Again, this is why I always suggest journaling through this incredibly emotional, amazing, eye-opening journey.

When you journal, and especially get good at practicing capturing that THOUGHT(or thoughts) , that CLICK in your head that then cause you to almost zombie like lead you to the fridge and then here you are emotionally eating, (sigh) again.  By journaling your feelings, thoughts, then soon, very soon you will recognize it or them.  You have to pay attention, because if you busy your life so much, or maybe you are yet to become a deeper thinker, you might miss it.  IT IS IMPORTANT TO YOUR HEALTH.  It is important so you do not BACKSLIDE on your goals and end up emotionally eating, which WILL sabotage all that hard work and how far you have come. Do you want that?  I doubt you do.  This is why you have got to figure it out, because emotional eating is like a DISORDER.  You've got to get to the root of it to learn to control it.

Here's a quick short experience of a woman. She gave me permission to share this. She felt there could be other women that could relate to her.

Yes, she too was an emotional eater.  She realized one of her triggers was when she began to feel ashamed, or worthless, unwanted.  UNWANTED was a big one. Everybody leaves, she felt.  She chose men that were bad for her.  These men were usually wrong for her because they took advantage of her low self-esteem. She was a bit needy she admitted.  Men can pick up on this FAST.  It's like they can easily  SENSE it. But sometimes, we exude those traits and not even realize it.   These men would be really sweet to her, but they had other motives and would never take too much time, getting to what it is they came for.  She always fell fall for it and they would hit it and then you know the ending, QUIT IT.   Although she knew from the start they weren't "KEEPERS", she set herself up.  She knew the ending.  She knew at some point she would feel low, ashamed, lonely, not attractive, unwanted and see HE LEFT TOO.

She realized, it wasn't the men, it was HER.  She was self-sabotaging herself and it was one big cycle. They were her ban-aide and she used them as much as they used her. They lifted her up for a while.  Made her feel pretty, made her laugh, made her feel good.  (Did you catch that "MADE HER"  They, not herself?)  It was a great outlet.   Before she started that non-sense; as she calls it, she would lose weight, was focused, slept well, then for some reason she would distract herself with these wrong men and then gain lots more back.  But little, did she realize that this was a trigger and she didn't even realize it, until she began to  have SELF-AWARENESS and really was raw and honest with herself. Her journal revealed volumes.  Are you picking up on things she was doing? Can you relate at all?

Today, she no longer wastes her time with these type of men.  It's a DISTRACTION that leads her to bigger size pants.  She would rather be single and wait for the right man after she allows herself to heal on the inside first. She needed to make herself happy.  She can't keep fooling herself and others, she needed to learn how to BE HAPPY IN HER SKIN, and of course all those feelings she sought out and relied on them to make her feel.  She realized as she started all over for a sixth time on her journey, she was going to do something different, because repeating past behaviors, and always landing back at the same spot, says a lot.  So, she likes alcoholics are encouraged to do, she decided to not date any men until 12 months into her journey.    At 12 months, she will ask herself the BLOG TITLE QUESTION...  This person is going to SOAR and now that she has recognized her 'trigger', she can catch it before it takes over her and leads her back to square one again.

Please, you need to know your triggers so you do not continue to emotional eat and backslide. THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT TO STEPS TO THE SUCCESS OF YOUR JOURNEY AND MAINTAINING A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE.

In Light & Love,
That Gym Girl

A QUICK NOTE FROM ME

You are not born a winner.

You are not born a loser.

You are born a CHOOSER.

Question.   Are you REALLY in control of your life? Are you creating your life and always evolving? Do you know what you motivation is?  Do you know why you are here and what you are meant to do?  Do you know how to find out?

Development begins at the first moment you know what you are supposed to be. You probably wouldn't learn what it is, unless you are constantly connected to your SOURCE. Or, you wouldn't learn what that is, if you are not truly PRESENT in your life.

People that just go through the motions in life are not in recognition of their life, they have no perspective. They are also blinded by the power of their own EGO.   Narcissistic people are controlled by their EGO.  So clueless, that they wouldn't even realize this applies to them.  They would believe it applies to everyone else.

Going through the motions in life is what I witness some of my friends doing and family doing. Existing is what a lot of people do. LIVING is not one of them.  Think about it.  I don't think you were born to get up go to work, come home plop on the couch and start again the next day.    This has created a lot of unhappiness within people and a sense of non-fulfillment.  Do you ever feel that way? Do you ever feel that there must be more to life than this?  We were placed here to serve others, not ourselves.  So whatever it is you are meant to do, I'm pretty sure it will involve serving others.

 The only way to find your motivation and what your life is to be about it, is to crucify your ego.

Love faces us everyday in different forms.  IF YOU STAY ASLEEP IN LIFE and let your EGO be the king of your castle, you will have never known the love, the form of love that stood before you, around you, above you, under you, beside you, the love that was there in so many ways and in so many forms , daily, weekly, monthly, annually, it's been there, it's still there WAKE UP,  STAY AWAKE, BE PRESENT IN EVERY MOMENT. Technology is a great DISTRACTION.  So to actually be present in the MOMENT, those moments don't involve your phone (PUT IT DOWN - especially when with others!).  There are many things I do with friends and family that I don't need to have my phone out taking photos of every play by play moment to post on Facebook or Instagram.  I don't need to respond to comments on Facebook. Or see what everyone else is doing while I'm DOING SOMETHING! LOL.   PUT IT DOWN. I myself had to work on that.   There are times people are loving you and you are too busy looking at your phone and miss the entire moment!  Being seriously present helps you find your way, the way I am speaking of.   I've experienced this firsthand with some friends.  I'm talking to them,  I have them over my home, etc.  and in midst of conversations, here comes the stupid phone.  And you will get nothing but "uh-huh, uh-huh" with no eye contact.  You know!  You might be guilty of this or have had this happen to you.

Life may not go the way we think it should.  WELL YOU CAN DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT. First wake up! Start LIVING rather than EXISTING.  Pay attention to THIS - We are in control of 2 things, how we prepare for what might happen and how we respond to what just happened.   What keeps us in the valley of frustration is our response.  We cannot allow external forces to bring us peace and  fulfillment.  Use your personality work for the spirit within you. That Spirit is embracing your true self. Sadly people don't think they are good enough, so they wouldn't experience this.  I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT -- YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH!  YES YOUR ARE!

You see, there is no story without conflict.  This is how we grow. Without conflict we cannot build ourselves and manage what we aspire to achieve.  If you are not AWAKE you won't know how to deal with conflict.  You could have an attitude, "you screw me over, I screw you over."  That's not a healthy mentality, that is evil. That is a person controlled by their EGO.  YIKES!

By knowing yourself and where you want to go, you can then control external forces to keep your internal peace, so you can keep pressing forward. Getting back at someone because they pissed you off is not healthy.  You are better than that.  This is an external force that will TRY to throw you off track, in a negative direction, losing your focus on where you want to go and are meant to go.  THAT IS YOUR EGO RUNNING YOU.

Our body is here to experience the show of our soul.  What show is playing out for your body?

- That Gym Girl